That plane be gone, them folks be dead. End of chat. It is sad, it is tragic, and I feel butthurt for every family who lost someone on that plane. I wish I had the power to un-fuck that flight but sadly I do not. Last night during a temporary, murderous rage-inducing, technical snafu that occurred while retrieving a saved program from the bowels of serpent-infested Hell that is On Demand, the television was stuck on one or the other Mainstream Media for what seemed eternity. It was a panel of “experts” arguing their own narrative for what possibly happened to the disappeared airliner. My confusion lies in how this constitutes 24/7 coverage, with raging assholes doing their rage thing, for anyone outside of the immediate families, plus some investigative forces such as Interpol? Who is sitting in their living room pounding coffee saying “I am not going to fucking bed until I find out if this plane is in 11,000 pieces swirling in eddies off the coast of Tahiti, or sitting as one huge chunk at the bottom of the Indian Ocean! I owe it to the families of the victims.” The so-called experts don’t know a goddamn thing themselves and serve no purpose beyond shitting from the mouth loudly and provocatively to keep John Q Public tuned into CNBXYZ until they are so scared of phantoms they can barely go on with their lives. I beseech you, if you are glued to coverage of this tragedy that in no way affects you, do the following: turn off the TV, read a book, go for a jog, play with your kids, call your grandma (because she sure as shit needs a break from watching it herself), smoke a bowl, walk your dog, smoke a rock, clean your toilet, jerk off, make a casserole, have a drink, fight a bum, dance a jig, but please by all means stop allowing the media to feast to your latent anxieties and turn off the news. There isn’t a damn thing that can be done for the dead except to live yourself.
Of course if the Aliens return the plane sometime soon with all the passengers fully probed but otherwise in good health, there will be egg on my face. I’m prepared to deal with that.