It is about son-of-a-bitch’n time someone finally held God accountable for a fuck-up. It is all praise for successes, all the time. But finally Steve Johnson showed some fucking balls and blamed the responsible party for dropping the game-winning touchdown against the Steelers yesterday: God. If it is God that catches passes and wins games for you, then it is God who drops passes and loses games. That simple. There is really no sense in wasting effort trying to figure out why he took time out of his busy day of listening to billions of prayers from billions of people just as stupid as you. Just know that God presently fucking hates you, and loves the Steelers. Maybe he’s a fan of all the chicks Rothlisberger is raping, maybe a Harrison cheap-shot that paralyzes a defenseless receiver really gives him a hard-on, perhaps he had some money on Pittsburgh, or it could even be as simple as God loves that Polamalu commercial where his Polynesian afro keeps getting progressively puffier. Whatever the case may be, for the time being God is pulling for the black and gold, at your expense.
And given that you are not taking credit for anything your physical being does in life, Steve Johnson, just go kill someone. Shoot them right in the face. God did it, not you.