Monthly Archives: August 2013

Well, Looks Like We’re Gonna Bomb Some Folks

It’s a done deal, folks. We’re bombing Syria. I heard all I need to hear in about 30 seconds of John Kerry shitting from the mouth and reading exactly 1 paragraph of a POTUS speech. Sadly we’ve bombed so many … Continue reading

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Miley Cyrus, The Achy Breaky BIG Mistakey

Today I wish to discuss an extremely important event in American history. No, I’m not talking about the 50th anniversary of the MLK ”I have a dream” speech. Frankly I’m over it. The speech embarrasses me. Not the speech itself, which … Continue reading

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Should I Preemptively Strike and Off Myself Now?

Decent chance of early grave this weekend. Dusting off the old outdoor jam flip flops, out in the sun, gettin’ weird brah. When I bought the tickets, 6 months ago, I had this vision of behaving like a mature, 35 … Continue reading

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The Scout Chronicles: I Effing Hate Dad

If I die before I finish this blog, tell the world my story. Feel like my guts are going to fall out of my ass at any moment. It all started innocently enough with Dad whispering to me at 5am, … Continue reading

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I’m Just Not Doing this Hashtag Shit

I know–I said the same thing about Facebook. But the hashtags must be stopped. They’re awful. People use them in media that don’t support click-through or linkage for hashtags. In fact I’m willing to bet they are used far more in … Continue reading

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Friday (WWTD)

(What Would Ted Do) Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice.

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Thursday Tee Shirt Showdown

Contestant #1 hails from the Blue Line this morning, Oak Park stop, 7:55am. Weighing in at really fucking fat, and sporting a pair of comically small round sunglasses that looked like a pince-nez on his fat head, though no Teddy … Continue reading

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Real Estate Ninja

Maybe you want a BIG NAME or a fast-talking real estate huckster who sees your shoes as being occupied by a dollar sign. Perhaps it is a giant national real estate monolith you seek with brand recognition and legions of … Continue reading

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Friday

This is my niece, Lacey Underall.

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