Monthly Archives: April 2011

The British Show the World Once Again they don’t Give a Shit what Century it is

The Royal Wedding is awesome. The Brits, like most of the rest of the world, are knock-knock-knocking on the door of fiscal insolvency. They are closing their office in Florence to save money for Christ’s sake. But that isn’t going … Continue reading

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Should Cleveland Browns Fans (Myself Included) Collectively Jump Off a Bridge?

Whilst checking Facebook, Twitter, the Internet in general, and other media sources the past day I witnessed probably the most depressing thing I’ve lived through as a life-long Browns fan. Some Browns fans are amped as all fuck because Peyton … Continue reading

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The Scout Chronicles: If Anyone is Listening….GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!

This is not a joke. This is a fucking emergency. I’d call 911 but I don’t have fucking thumbs. The goddamn iPhones my parents just bought operate on body heat, and guess what? Apparently dog paw nails don’t produce any … Continue reading

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Save the Date: May 21st, 2011

Its a RAPTURE mutherfuckers!!! Jesus and God and the Apostles and Baby Jesus and Mary and Peter and Mother Theresa and Michael Jackson and all those hard-chargin‘ sons of bitches swooping down out of Heaven like a fucking shitstorm, zapping … Continue reading

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This Russian Dude at my Gym Killed You 3 Times Before You Hit the Ground

The explosion in popularity of mixed martial arts has led to a perfectly correlated explosion of complete and utter douche bags in gyms across America. Affliction tee shirts, Tapout shorts, an attempt to cover up a lack of physical fitness … Continue reading

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Its Official: Obama can go and Fuck Right Off

I’m so done with this mutherfucker. And it hurts. It really hurts. I bought the whole package, hook, line and fucking sinker. The charismatic, intellectual black man with the progressive agenda to navigate this American ship away from stormy seas … Continue reading

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