Monthly Archives: March 2011

How do I Enlist in Charlie Sheen’s Army?

Tagged , | Leave a comment

The Scout Chronicles: I Think Someone is Trying to Pull an “Inception” on my Ass

Although I can’t be 100% sure, I think I’m being Inceptioned. And if the movie taught me anything, it’s that you don’t even know you are being Inceptioned. What I do know is that if I wake up at any … Continue reading

Tagged , , | 4 Comments

How did I Ever Wake Up in the Morning and Breathe Air Without an iPhone?

Now that I have the iPhone 4 on Verizon, I am very puzzled about the following: Prior to having this iPhone, how was I NOT in the fetal position in the corner of an abandoned warehouse fraught with tremors and … Continue reading

Tagged , | 2 Comments

An Ode to a Bus Fart

O Bus FartYou care not for the recycled nature of public transit airFlourishing in the unventilated cabinUnfettered by fresh breezesAnswering to no one in your anonymityBlamed most unfairly on minorities and the elderlyMusty and musky you hover playfully at face … Continue reading

Tagged , | Leave a comment